As you might
have guessed, Dotheboys Hall was nothing like the advertisement.
The buildings were crumbling; the classroom was filthy
with broken windows and a few benches; there were almost
no books and the pupils were miserable, depressed and
dressed in rags. The only 'single sticks' were likely
to be bits of broken furniture.
This
is a lesson taken by Mr Squeers who is showing Nicholas
how to teach. Click on the audio button to hear
it being read aloud.
Please
note that on slower connections there may
be a small delay before the audio begins playing
- please be patient!
"After
some half-hour's delay, Mr Squeers reappeared,
and the boys took their places and their books,
of which latter commodity
the average was about one to eight learners. A few
minutes having elapsed,
during which Mr Squeers looked very profound,
as if he had a perfect apprehension
of what was inside all the books, and could say
every word of their contents by heart if he only
chose to take the trouble, that gentleman called
up the first class. Obedient
to this summons there ranged themselves in front
of the schoolmaster's desk, half-a-dozen scarecrows,
out at knees and elbows, one of whom placed a torn
and filthy book beneath his learned eye.
'This is the first class in English spelling and
philosophy,
Nickleby,' said Squeers, beckoning Nicholas to stand
beside him.
'We'll get up a Latin one, and hand that over to
you. Now, then, where's the first boy?'
'Please, sir, he's cleaning the back parlour
window,' said the temporary
head
of the philosophical class.
'So he is, to be sure,' rejoined Squeers. 'We go
upon the practical mode of teaching, Nickleby; the regular
education system. C-l-e-a-n, clean, verb active,
to make bright, to scour. W-i-n, win, d-e-r, der,
winder, a casement. When the boy knows this out
of book, he goes and does it. It's just the same
principle as the use of the
globes. Where's the second boy?'
'Please, sir, he's weeding the garden,' replied
a small voice.
'To be sure,' said Squeers, by no means disconcerted.
'So he is. B-o-t, bot, t-i-n, tin, bottin, n-e-y,
ney, bottinney, noun substantive, a knowledge of
plants. When he has learned that bottinney means
a knowledge of plants, he goes and knows 'em. That's
our system, Nickleby: what do you think of it?'
'It's a very useful one, at any rate,' answered
Nicholas.
'I believe you,' rejoined Squeers, not remarking
the emphasis of his usher*.
'Third boy, what's a horse?'
'A beast, sir,' replied the boy.
'So it is,' said Squeers… 'A horse
is a quadruped, and quadruped's
Latin for beast, as everybody that's gone through
the grammar knows, or else where's the use of having
grammars at all?'
'Where, indeed!' said Nicholas abstractedly.
'As you're perfect in that,' resumed Squeers, turning
to the boy, 'go and look after my horse, and rub
him down well, or I'll rub you down. The rest of
the class go and draw water up, till somebody tells
you to leave off, for it's washing-day to-morrow,
and they want the coppers* filled.'
So saying, he dismissed the first class to their
experiments in practical philosophy…
*Usher:
Assistant school master.
*Coppers: The copper containers that washing water
was heated in.
Squeers
may know some impressive phrases, but which words
does he spell wrongly?
Write a mock advertisement for Dotheboys Hall, in
100 words, giving as many clues as possible as to
how it really is. Choose your words carefully.
Click
on each of the words in red above to find out
which language they come from.
'C14th' means the word was first recorded in the
fourteenth century. Look at the dates these words
were first used.
